After our award winning travel guide to LA, the first travel article to win a Pulitzer and a Nobel Prize, we had to bring you insider tips to another global hotspot: Berlin.
With so much culture, nightlife and history Berlin offers something for everyone. It’s still a hub for avant garde music after all these years and is a must visit destination for anyone travelling to Europe for the first time. In fact, if you die without having visited Berlin people will think you’re a fucking noob forever. Like on your fucking grave they won’t even put your name. It’ll just be like “Noob: 1989-2020”. Yes, you will die young. Prepare yourself now.
Ok enough chitchat, let’s dive into this amazing city!
There are so many options to choose from in Berlin that picking a place to eat can be daunting. Every neighbourhood has something to offer.
If you’re just arriving by train to the Hauptbahnhof (that means main train station in German) a great place to grab a quick bite is in the McDonalds.
If you’re exploring Alexanderplatz, the heart of old East Berlin, theres a McDonalds right in the main U-Bahn/S-Bahn station.
There’s also another McDonalds at the historic Checkpoint Charlie where East met West during the Cold War.
There’s tons of McDonalds in Berlin so you always have someplace to eat where you know the food is clean because you can never be sure in a place like Germany. They just have a different culture and different standards of hygiene.
Now if there is one thing Berlin is famous for, other than its Nazi past, it’s the nightlife. A lot of people tend to focus on the house music and techno scenes when they visit. That’s all fine and good for a while but you’d be missing out on all the other cool experiences the city has to offer.
One of the best places to hit up on any night in Berlin is the TGI Friday’s located right in the heart of the city between Museum Island and Alexanderplatz.
Where else can you go on a Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and it always feels like Friday, the best day of the week? Nowhere else is where. A real Berlin landmark.
Another cool place to go is the recently opened Hakkasan Berlin.
Finally Berlin clubbing steps into the modern era. It’s the first club in Berlin to offer a clean and bright environment. One thing visitors to Berlin were always complaining about was the lack of bottle service. That’s not a problem at this nightclub. All the best premium vodkas are available here to be mixed with a choice of water, tonic or cranberry juice. The music is energetic and accessible. No more waiting for some techno snob to mix out of his 10 minute minimal garbage track. The drops come fast and furiously like Vin Diesel. Scared you might run into a gay person? Don’t worry. Everyone here is straight.
Even though there are no American Eagle or Abercrombie stores, Berlin has always been at the forefront of fashion and today this is truer than ever. Here are some cool tips on how to dress and where to shop.
Everyone in Berlin enjoys dressing in vibrant colours. They make lots of jewelry out of beads in Berlin and many people can be found selling their bead jewelry on the streets and in parks.
In Berlin many white people grow dreads. Often, to keep their dreads looking good, they don’t shower. To smell nice they use what is called “patchouli” which is a traditional German way to make yourself smell nice. Check out the markets and ask for “patchouli” if you really want to feel like a local. No one will know you’re from Texas.
Well that’s about it! I’m bored of writing this article. Enjoy your trip!